The Random News

We don't report the news daily. We don't report it weekly. We report it randomly. Maybe we'll report more tomorrow, maybe we won't. Ha!




Top Story: Water Vinca



Some time, very early this morning, the Water City bots stormed out of their homes and launched an attack on the Vinca. Sources say that many casualties occurred while the bots secured their positions on old Lagville. Their attack at first seemed unprovoked and unexplained. They however let in one of our reporters for an interview.

Nicklas: Now that I have wings, I decided that my minions and I should leave that one equine excuse for a dump of a town and find new and better places to breed twinks.

Colosseum didn't have much to say, other than this.

Colosseum: All fighting has been halted until further orders

Pisces obviously has very high aspirations and predicts that this is only the beginning.

Pisces: Today the Vinca, tomorrow the Acropolis! Soon, all of Furcadia will fall under the brutal iron paw of Nicklas!

It seems that in the short time on the Vinca, the bots have already recruited some furres to fight by their side.

Metastallion: I AM STALLION
Metastallion: I AM BEAST
Metastallion: STAND BACK
Metastallion: OR BE DESTROYED
Metastallion SMASHES OWSLA
Metastallion: DIE DIE DEI
Metastallion: BOT IS DEAD

Nick Lachey: vv@$!#
Nick Lachey: $!##
Nick Lachey: $!##

If the bots are successful in their mission, it could mean a big change in the way of life for many Furcadians. There will most likely be a law that not being a twink would get one banned. This could be a bad thing or a good thing, only time will tell.

Kiwi De L'eau: I would like to thank Philantha for all her support.


Missing Mouse

After being arrested for "being funnier than the Owsla" as reported yesterday in Furcadia Weekly, guards awoke this morning to find Vlady missing from his cell. "There were no signs of an escape or anything. He was just... gone," remarks one guard. An official liason to the Owsla, who wishes to remain anonymous, said the following.

Anonymous Liason: There is more here than meets the eye. I thought the arrest itself was fishy when I first found out about it. First of all, there's nothing funny about Vlady except maybe his face. Second, if there's a law against being funnier than the Owsla, then every non-Owsla in Furcadia would have to be arrested, because the Owsla are the least funny furres that exist. No, there is more to this arrest and this "escape" than anyone wants us to know.

Whatever the circumstances, the Owsla have put a bounty of a dragon and two pairs of wings on Vlady's head. But you only get one pair of wings if he's not alive.


Lost Lakes Mentioned

A guild that seems to avoid our comments most of the time, finally gets mentioned in our news. No, nothing has really happened in there that we know of, but we decided they deserve a mention. The members of the guild seem to be very happy about it.

Alexsi: This is great, I never thought my guild would ever be important enough to get an entire segment on the Random News... I'm speechless.

Krem: This is the greatest thrill in my life since I became an Owsla.

Yun Liu: I can't believe they made it into the dream with us blocking the entrance.

Gental Soul: I make bots!

We wish all the luck in Furcadia to Lost Lakes and its members.



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