The Random News

And you thought there wouldn't be anything tonight.

Top Story: Youlzilla!

Some relatively unknown and unpopular city, most likely Crystal Tokyo, was brutally destroyed today by a giant dragon known as the Youlanda. At about some time after the morning, she came barreling in out of nowhere and began a rampage that lasted for minutes. At least one furre was in the vicinity at the time, and recorded the entire thing on Winamp. He has posted the entire thing on Napster for you to download, under the name "Vlady Sucks", so if you want to hear it, search for that. If you can't find it there, we have posted an excerpt of the transcript for you to read. If you can't even find that, then... Hi Klass!

[#] BOOOM!!!!

[#] BOOOM!!!! BOOOM!!!!


Youlanda: EAT MY DUST!!! GRRRRR!!! ^.^

Draeven: Ahhh! No!!! Youlanda, no--

[#] SPLAT!!


Youlanda is still loose somewhere in Furcadia. If you hear any booms, then take cover immediately. The safest place is Ctrl-X, but Ctrl-S works too.

And that's the end of that chapter.


In case you haven't been there lately, the FurreUhmm has been remodeled. It has shed its ugly Bravenetness and taken a whole new look that requires everyone to get familiar with another system. But have no fear! You can complain about it right there on the forum if you don't like it that much. And if you do like it, you can bitch at the one who is complaining about it. The possibilities are endless!

Plus, there's some neato graphics you can use, like this little guy.


So go there now, and start posting messages, and tell everyone about Randomism, because you know that they know that they just can't get enough!

And be sure to tell Sidereal to stop complaining if we don't post something for a mere four days. What a baby!

Brittle Dish

Soup Dish Times, the website that referenced Randomism more than it referenced Furcadia, has closed its doors, nearly five minutes after they were installed. Some say it was caused by the stock market, others say sanctimonious did it. The bottom line is, a crazed lunatic shouldn't try to run a business right after he has escaped from the asylum. We all have learned a great lesson here.

Now, some have predicted that Randomism will fall prey to a similar fate, but don't listen to them, because that's just the Circle trying to brainwash you again. The Soup Dish may have come crashing down, but Randomism survives. As one of Randomism's best writers, let me tell you the deal.

The boss screwed up and let 95% of the employees go on their two-week vacation at the same time. So that leaves only me, the janitor and the Head Randomist. The Head Randomist can't write worth a crap and the janitor is a little better but not much, so I'm running the whole show right now. But since we have no real laywers (Clawz was the closest thing to a lawyer that we ever had) I've had to spend most of my time defending against lawsuits like the one by Entropy Serpent who claims that he is not featured in Randomism enough, and Emerald Flame who is bitching about some birthday cake thing that gave her nightmares.

SO... We.. or.. *I* will try to keep you as updated as possible with all of the funny things around Furcadia, but until everyone else gets back, there might be a few gaps. But the TRUE Randomism fan still believes in us and our commitment to providing the highest quality entertainment at other furres' expense that exists on this side of the internet. So have faith, and never lose hope.

YAY! I got a whole article done by myself! In your FACE Stoinker!